President Barack Abortion - metaphorically speaking -- is increasingly becoming the angry pimp hand that is smacking the disoriented ho of our economy by pushing his massive anti-life government healthcare rationing scheme on the American public.
Things are getting serious. Earlier this week, Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid unveiled a health care bill which provides for an unprecedented expansion of federally-funded abortion. In the new Senate bill, the abortion language revealed on pages 116 through 124 that the bill will:
- Require a plan that covers abortion in every insurance market.
- Allow the U.S. Secretary of Health and Human Services to require coverage of any and all abortions through the public option.
- Create new tax-funded subsidies to purchase private health plans that will cover abortion.
I've said it a trillion times, but it does need repeating: The majority of Americans believe that health care plans should not be mandated to provide coverage for ignorant women who elect to have their child mutilated and dissected and left swishing in the fluids of other unlucky kids whose mommies were also pro-choice.
Normal people who oppose the senseless slaying of multitudes of children feel that it is a duty to voice opposition to tax hikes, anti-life government mandates, and redistributive taxpayer-funded public options. As a result, countless Americans have been demanding that Congress actually allow the free market to work, and put socialist Obamacare in the dumpster where it belongs. (I can just hear the collective gasp from Planned Parenthood now. "You can't put Obamacare in the dumpster! That's where we put our second trimester babies!")
Speaking of civilian demands on the President, check out this juicy bit of news! I'm sure you all are aware of Obama's self-congratulatory bragging on how his stimulus bill has been "creating thousands of jobs" across the nation. Well, some pesky group of Americans called "We the People" have had the audacity to demand facts from the Obama Administration concerning what, when and exactly where these created jobs are.
Which brings us to Recovery.gov, an official government White House website (that apparently costs $84 million of tax-payers money to run) that has been posted to the public. This website lists a crap-load of jobs created in a butt-load of congressional districts to "prove" that Obama is being responsible with our money. The only problem is that a lot of the jobs - and a lot of the $787 billion that is going into helping to create those jobs - are going to Congressional Districts that don't even exist!
This means only one of two things. Either Obama lackeys can't count, or they are just dirty rotten liars.
Think about it. We are paying close to a billion dollars for some shmucks in Obama's harem to randomly tap out imaginary numbers to justify blowing our cash on who knows what. I have some theories as to why the Obamabots fudged up so horribly on this one, one of which is that since most Obama supporters can't read, they just assumed no one else would trouble themselves by actually looking at the website.
The other theory is that the Obama Administration is just filled to overflowing with liars who have no qualms inventing hundreds of phantom Congressional Districts that are magically popping up all across the nation. In all probability, it's most likely a combination of the two. After all, stupidity and deception often go hand in hand.
But that is one of my favorite things about liars. A leading characteristic of "The Liar" is that they are usually really, really dumb. Their lies aren't even half-way believable. And that's really funny. For instance, while trying to sprinkle extra Districts in, they do so by claiming to have saved over 10,000 jobs in over 10 Congressional Districts in Kansas... even though Kansas only has 4 Districts.
I mean, come on. It's KANSAS. It has, 1) The District that grows corn. 2) The District where the Wicked Witch and Dorothy live. 3) The District where nothing ever happens. And 4) The District where that dead abortionist used to kill viable babies.
Now, we can either call Obama and his Administration out on this laughably large lie. Or we can take him at his word. If he says California has imaginary Congressional Districts 57, 64, 67, 76, 80, 91, 99 and (my personal favorite) district 00, then I'll bite.
See, all this time I've been busy contacting my Congressional leaders to express my concern over the anti-life monstrosity that is Obamacare. But why bother with pestering Congressional leaders when there are so many Congressional Districts left unclaimed? It is simply a shame that the Obama Administration has spent tremendous amounts of tax dollars to create massive amounts of jobs in these previously unknown Districts, and yet these imaginary lands are left without a voice in Congress.
After all, Recovery.gov has created over 700 phantom Congressional Districts nationwide. That's more than we actually have in Congress. If we fill those seats in every phantom district, we can take over Congress!!!
This is why I feel moved to announce the start of my campaign for Congress in California's very own Double-Zero District. Since no one knew that this phantom land existed until now, I am pretty much vying for this position virtually unopposed. Victory is essentially mine and I haven't even had dinner yet!
I encourage everyone to look up the phantom Districts in their state and run for office. Contact your newspapers. Raise a stink. Make sure your community knows that you believe Obama would not lie to the public, and therefore you are taking him at his word. Make your voice heard! We want no more Obamacare. No more robbing of the American people just so Obama can get his do-goodism jollies out in attempting to stimulate an economy that has repeatedly said no. (This, kiddies, is what some would call rape.)
When government is put in the position of making decisions about what will be funded and what will not be funded, that is exactly what it will do - decide what and who gets the funding, the masses be damned. Obama seeks to make health care no longer a personal decision, not a market decision, nor even an economic decision. He is making it a political decision.
Activists: As you run for your imaginary seat in your imaginary district, make your message clear. We want no more government bullying the American people and telling us what to do with our money. If we don't want our taxes to go towards the ever-increasing mound of babies lying mangled in unmarked graves, then a nation run by the people and for the people dictates that taxes should not be going there.
When I picture Obama making plans from the Oval Office, it's kind of reminiscent of the evil Bowler Hat Guy from Meet the Robinsons when he hunches over his rainbows-and-unicorns daily planner. With the unbelievable amount of things left undone on his presidential 'To Do' list, it really sucks that the one thing he chose to work on checking off is, 'Screw Up America'. It's time we remind America. Obama was placed in the White House to serve us. Not his own agenda.
Good luck and happy campaigning my friends. Your imaginary districts have my vote!
- Gingi Edmonds
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